


Transformation

by nerav



Category: THE iDOLM@STER, THE iDOLM@STER: SideM
Genre: Angst, Gen, Secret Santa, Teru-ble puns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-08
Updated: 2018-03-08
Packaged: 2019-03-28 17:12:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13908549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nerav/pseuds/nerav
Summary: It’s the Christmas season and Teru has the perfect plan on how to celebrate it.





	Transformation

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Raindene](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Raindene/gifts).



> This fic was dedicated to Raindene as a Secret Santa gift from the SideM reddit. It’s been slightly revised to fix typos and weird phrasing.

Teru nearly forgot it was that special time of year. After weeks of rigorous rehearsals, exercise, and vocal training that left him passed out on his sofa by the end of the day―with no thanks to Kaoru’s strict regime―time flew so fast that he could hardly keep up. There was hardly a moment where he could stop and notice the leaves turning, or the snow crumpling on the floor. It was only when he saw the producer hanging garlands over their furniture that he remembered the Christmas season.

As soon as the thought crossed his mind, he beamed. Adrenaline fueled, he rushed to assist the producer with the decorations. Without hesitation, he lifted the heavy tree from the boxes by himself and littered it with all sorts of ornaments. He felt like a child all over again, pouring his entire heart into whimsical things to impress Santa Claus with.

The producer was nearly taken aback by his enthusiasm. “Tendou- _san_ ,” he said, blinking, “You certainly seem excited today. Did something happen recently?”

“Of course I am,” Teru nodded, “it’s Christmas time! The most crucial time of the year where everyone’s smiles shine the brightest!”

The producer chuckled into his fist. “I see. I hope you work your hardest then.”

“Definitely!”

Of course, there was no performance for DRAMATIC STARS this year. CaféParade would be leading the Christmas party, leaving the other idols with light, flexible work to wrap around their Christmas shopping and vacations. Despite that, Teru’s will was unshaken and he put twice the effort into his roles than usual. His voice was booming and boisterous that he made sure everyone heard him from every floor up, whether they like to or not.

When it was finally _the day_ , Teru yanked Tsubasa and Kaoru by the sleeves as soon as rehearsal was over. He ignored Kaoru’s frustrated quips and hummed a merry song as he dragged them through the halls, into the office’s living room.

Once he flipped the light switch, he finally released the two and rushed to set up the TV. His unitmates stood in bewilderment as he scrambled to find the remote to change the channel. (Someone appeared to be using the television before them recently. Judging from the sight of a whale swimming on the screen, he highly suspected it to be Chris.)

Kaoru fixed his ruffled clothes. “Can you finally tell us why you dragged us all the way here?” he huffed as he adjusted his sleeves.

Teru grinned. Not even the ire in Kaoru’s voice deterred his jolly mood for once. “Today’s the day, the most important day of the month!”

Kaoru took one hard look at the calendar hanging from the wall, then glared back at Teru. “It’s only the 18th.”

“And?”

“ _And?_ ” Kaoru mocked his incredulous voice. “Do you not realize you’re still a whole week away from Christmas?”

“Who said anything about Christmas?”

“But Teru- _san_ ,” Tsubasa murmured, “what other thing could be so important this month?”

“This!”

Right on cue, he found his channel. As soon as he selected it, the screen transformed from a simple, tranquil scene into something far more exhilarating.

Already, the action had begun as the recap clip rolled. In a short span of a minute, all sorts of things were displayed in rapid succession that kept his eyes glued to the screen: green-screened mushroom-cloud explosions, dramatic closeups on handsome actors’ eyes, and people posing with unique getups. Just remembering the events of last week’s episode fueled his fist so much blood that he quaked as he pumped it.

“Super Sentai Christmas Special!” Teru shouted. He imitated the pose of the red-suited man shown behind him.

Instead of applause like he anticipated, his companions merely hung their jaws, stunned speechless. It took a moment before Kaoru collected himself to finally respond.

“Unbelievable,” Kaoru said. “You’re making us watch one of your silly _tokusatsu_ shows?”

“Of course!”

“T-Teru- _san_ ,” Tsubasa said as he gestured for Teru to calm himself. “I don’t mind that at all, but―”

“ _I_ do,” Kaoru interrupted with a dark mutter, shifting his pupils to the side.

Ignoring him, Tsubasa continued, “But… why is it so important that we do so?”

“You’ll find out once you watch!”

Without saying anything further, Teru plopped onto the sofa and slouched back. The other two exchanged worrying glances before looking back at Teru. After a few minutes passed and the opening theme of the show played, Tsubasa shyly maneuvered his way toward the sofa and sat beside Teru.

Kaoru crossed his arms and stood militant, unflinching in his resolve to not humor Teru’s antics. If he hoped Teru would excuse him, however, he would be sadly mistaken.

“Come on, Sakuraba!” Teru exclaimed, gesturing him to join them. “It’d be super _sentai-sational_ if you’d just watch for a few minutes!”

He raised an eyebrow. “Really, Tendou? That’s a horrible pun, even for you.”

“Yeah, well, that’s how desperate I am!” Teru clasped his hands together and lowered his head in between them. If Kaoru wanted him to kneel, he might actually do it for once, and damn his own pride in the process. “Come on, Sakuraba. Just once, and you can insult it all you want if it makes you feel better. You won’t even need to get me a Christmas gift if you do this!”

“I wasn’t planning to, but….” Kaoru fumbled with his lips at his sorry sight. At last, it was working. The ice in his eyes melted briefly before he closed them and let out a defeated sigh. Putting his arms to his sides, he quietly took a seat on the opposite side of Tsubasa.

Now that the chatter was over, Teru gave him complete attention back to the show. He could barely hear the small gasps Tsubasa made when he saw the innocent citizens attacked by the Monster of the Week; instead, he heard the people’s screams as if he were right there in person. He didn’t pay attention to Kaoru’s mumbles as he mocked how silly the catch phrases were, or when Tsubasa rushed from his seat as soon as the commercial break aired to grab some snacks. His mind completely focused on how the color-coded squad of heroes transformed and rushed in the nick of time to save the people, essentially also saving Christmas in the process.

He felt his heart fluttering as if he were on stage, watching how grateful the people were from being rescued. From rich to poor, young to old, so many different people all came together in their support when the rangers were trapped inside the demolished building. Though the scenario was hardly unique, there was something more poignant about it during the Christmas season, when messages of goodwill and generosity rang throughout the episode.

The excitement died down once the ending credits rolled, bringing Teru back to reality.

“Thank god that atrocity’s over,” Kaoru muttered.

“Kaoru- _san_ ,” Tsubasa chuckled, “wasn’t it still enjoyable?”

“Of course not. It’s amazing this show still manages to keep running in fifteen-plus installments, with such horrible acting and shoddy special effects.”

“But, Kaoru- _san_ , you still smiled when the Blue Ranger rushed back to get the child’s present, didn’t you?”

Kaoru blushed. Instead of retorting, he awkwardly adjusted his glasses and looked away.

“Man, that was so good!” Teru shouted. “I can’t wait for next week’s episode!”

Teru reached for the remote to change the channel. Before he grasped it, he paused. Looking down at his sleeve, he saw the red scarf wrapped around his wrist. It had clung to his skin for months, but it felt like such an integral part of his body that Teru almost forgot it was even there.

His goofy grin suddenly turned solemn. Forgetting the remote, he raised his arm and clutched his wrist, feeling the fabric carefully. He reflected.

While watching the show, all he kept wondering was how much he wanted to be just like the rangers. But only now did he also remember the horrible truth: he _tried_ to do exactly that, and failed miserably. He remembered the stressful years studying law, practicing in mock trials, and counseling clients. It wasn’t the flashy way he always dreamt it to be, but he thought this was the way to be a hero in real-world terms.

Instead, as soon as he was met with a challenge, he realized that he couldn’t transform and save the day. He couldn’t face the nearly impossible adversity and rescue the victimized individuals. Instead, he choked, and left.

It worked out in a way, when he met the producer and became an idol, but the realization dawned on him: was he still running away from his dream? Was the idol business just a convenient alternative? Would his favorite heroes on television be the same if they decided they couldn’t defeat the villain and left it to someone else’s work?

“Tendou,” Kaoru said, breaking Teru from his reverie. “You’re thinking. That’s not like you.”

Teru didn’t felt like firing back with a snark of his own. He pursed his lips, eyes downcast.

“Teru- _san_ ,” Tsubasa said, frowning. “Is something the matter? Didn’t you enjoy the show?”

“I did,” Teru admitted. He gave a half-smile back at him. “It’s just… I’m starting to doubt my choices again, I suppose.”

“What do you mean?”

“I wondered if I shouldn’t have given up on my dream to become a lawyer in the end.”

The blunt response surprised Tsubasa. “But what about being an idol?”

“I know. I don’t regret becoming one. But I feel like….” He swallowed hard. “Like, what I’m doing isn’t enough. That I’m just sticking with the second best thing, when I should have tried harder for my clients. Because I’d feel like my heroes wouldn’t have done something like that.”

Finished with his monologue, he looked back at his unitmates, eyebrows furrowed. He didn’t expect them to respond. Even he wasn’t sure what he was going with this. Was he considering quitting his idol business? Or work part-time, like some of the other units were?

Rather than give him an answer to lead him in the right direction, Kaoru sighed. He clutched his forehead and groaned, “Idiot.”

That one struck a nerve this time. “Hey! I’m being serious for once!”

Kaoru folded his arms. “So you think all of this was a waste of time? You consider DRAMATIC STARS just an escape for failing your clients?”

“I’m… not,” Teru averted his face, his voice weak.

“K-Kaoru- _san_ ,” Tsubasa murmured. He hesitated before clearing his throat. He faced Teru’s direction with a look of resolve. “I think Kaoru- _san_ has a point, Teru- _san_.”

“You do?” Teru blinked. It was so rare for Tsubasa to agree with Kaoru that he half-wondered if he was dreaming.

Tsubasa nodded. “I think you’re greatly underestimating how much you help others still. You play such an important role in making so many people smile.”

“But….”

“You already have the clothes,” Kaoru added. “You have the corny lines too, for sure. All that’s missing from your show is a leader with steady ambition to help the people.”

“‘Steady ambition’,” Teru repeated in awe.

“Do you think your heroes immediately knew their calling? Of course not; they’re young and foolish like all young adults are. Probably getting jobs, or studying for school. They just found a different means to do what they always wanted in life, and so do you. But their passion is still there.”

“That’s right, Kaoru- _san_!” Tsubasa said. “Teru- _san_ just found his transform-trinket when he signed his contract to become an idol.”

“You guys….” Teru couldn’t speak anymore.

The realization hit him like a truck, leaving him nearly winded. He bit his lower lip as he suppressed the warm feelings bubbling inside, squeezing his eyes shut. He failed to care when tears escaped from his lids.

How could he be so stupid? They were right. If he did anything wrong, it was to doubt his compassion in the first place. How could he have forgotten the young and old, the rich and poor people, in his very audience? The ones who desperately wanted to shake his hands, as if the simple gesture meant the whole world to them? How could he downplay his unitmates’ part in securing such joy?

He gritted his teeth and rubbed his eyes. He lifted his head high, no longer feeling that crumbling sensation in his gut. He beamed.

“You’re absolutely right! DRAMATIC STARS is no different from the rangers. We’re already doing our best to make everyone feel loved and cherished during Christmas!”

“I’m glad some sense got into you finally,” Kaoru said. Despite his rude remark, a small smile creased his lips.

Tsubasa nodded. “Teru- _san_ , maybe we can form our own sentai group?”

Teru’s eyes flashed. “That’s a brilliant idea, Tsubasa! I’ll be _Saikou_ Red, the hero of justice!”

He laughed. “And I’ll be _Saikou_ Green. I love food!”

That last comment had nothing to do with heroism, but Teru ignored it. Instead, he struck a pose, Tsubasa following his lead in doing the same. Only Kaoru remained unfazed by their amazing display.

“And _I’ll_ be getting out of here….” With that, he simply about-faced and walked away from the living room.

Teru widened his eyes. “Hey, wait, Sakuraba! We need _Saikou_ Blue! We need at least one obligatory lone wolf ranger! Sakuraba!”

Kaoru didn’t hear him, or rather, he pretended he didn’t and kept walking. Growling, Teru chased after him. Tsubasa gave a laugh as he merely watched the two.

“Merry Christmas, Teru- _san_ ,” Tsubasa said, in such a quiet voice that Teru almost didn’t hear him.

Teru smiled back and winked. Then, just as soon as he did, he faced ahead and continued his scrambling pursuit of Kaoru.


End file.
